23 years old with the world at her feet, Charlotte, my eldest daughter was fit & healthy, very bright, in a fabulous job, madly in love with her boyfriend of 6 years, living in a beautiful part of London with a great social life so what could possibly go wrong? She was looking forward to a future involving the engagement, the beautiful home they would buy, the big wedding & the patter of tiny feet.
This truly is what Charlotte believed would bring her ultimate happiness and fulfilment.
The bombshell came one dark Sunday evening; her boyfriend just got up from the couch and said he was leaving and he did just that; he walked out of the front door and unbeknown to Charlotte that was the last time she would ever see him. The relationship between Charlotte and I had become very strained over the years as I had unknowingly tried to ‘control’ her in many areas of her life from choosing exams, her food, her clothes and her boyfriend – I could ‘see’ that as a couple they weren’t a great fit but was that really my business?
Well, I thought it was my job as a mother to advise but by keeping Charlotte close to my chest I actually pushed her away… for months we hardly spoke until she rang that day explained the news and in the next breath, she flew home to Dubai to lick her wounds. Charlotte had a choice to make, feel sorry herself and stay in the depths of darkness or take a step out of the prison she had built around herself.
With her heart being truly broken Charlotte sank into the depths of despair but slowly started to see glimpses of light as she started on her journey of self-discovery. Her ex-boyfriend had given her a gift – a gift of freedom to travel; she had no attachments, no responsibilities, what better time to see the world. Terrified, scared, full of fear, mixed with excitement Charlotte set off on an 8-month trip starting in Australia, New Zealand and onto South America.
Charlotte had escaped her own prison by leaping into the unknown; are you suffering right now in the depths of despair? This could be your chance to start your journey and never look back. You could discover your greatest strength from your deepest pain.
Here are some questions to ask yourself today:
Be totally honest with yourself – what do you want in life? If you don’t know write out what you don’t want and turn it around. Live a life with integrity, one you won’t regret.
Find someone you trust to support you, someone you can share your dreams with, and someone who has your best interests at heart – don’t be alone.
Think about what you are compelled to do, what is your uniqueness in this world – we all have a gift?
Take a risk, embrace change, you don’t need to know the answers or the outcome, no one ever does, just trust that first step.
Look at what is stopping you from changing, what are you holding on to? Once you identify the resistance, it will start to dissolve.
Fulfill your immediate needs – is this sleep, relaxation, food or fun? By looking after these right now you are setting precedence for your happiness in the future.
Celebrate your gifts, celebrate each day, you will feel valued and gain inner strength to burst out of that prison wall you have built yourself.
Months later Charlotte arrived home a new woman, a woman who knew what she wanted, a woman who knew who she was and where she was going. Was her life mapped out? Of course not, but what she has learned will be her most valuable asset – to trust herself. Could she have envisaged her new life, as it stands now – a wonderful new boyfriend, fabulous job, happy family relationships, peace, joy, and confidence – NO! All she did was trust herself.
To discover this at 25 years old is a miracle – but it’s never too late. Take the leap today – ask yourself today what you are waiting for?
Can’t wait to hear from you!